The Journaling Experiment

You can listen to this blog post below.

Some time ago, I began writing blog posts that fell under the topic “More Questions Than Answers”. It was a space for me to write blog posts that may not be neatly tied up in a bow, but instead where I could explore my thoughts, and invite readers to explore theirs. Nothing more, nothing less. You can read some of the others I have written here. And today is all about my journaling experiment that I have been running for almost a month. 

I have been taking part in a challenge to write every day in July, and I have been using the time to work on a novel that has been ongoing for quite some time, as well as to continue a personal challenge I set myself to journal every day for 30 days. Those who know me know - I don’t like journaling. This hasn’t prevented me from having a journal-buying-habit - but I use those journals (if indeed I write in them at all) for scribbling notes, shopping lists, ideas, client notes and blog posts that strike me when I am on the move.

However, a few people that I admire have been recently talking about how impactful their journaling practice has been, and I finally decided to take the plunge and commit to journaling daily for a month, and see what happens.

This time, I am doing a type of journaling called future casting - where I write things that I want to happen in my future, as if they have already happened. I have been combining this with writing out new beliefs that I want to have and cement, and also celebrations and gratitudes. These are a combination of different prompts that I have gotten from different people over the years - all of whom swear by the life changing power of journaling.

I won’t lie - I’m not convinced. Even though I have made it to day 26 (and I will probably continue beyond the 30 days - just to see if it works!) and even though I am an adamant believer in the power of writing things down - the question I have always asked about journaling is - what makes it so potent for those who find it useful? I wonder - is it just the act of writing that gets your brain in gear?

Whenever I think about this question, I think about Bart Simpson at the beginning of every Simpsons episode, writing lines on the chalkboard, before going off andbeing Bart, doing what he always did.

I think about the times I had to write lines at school, and wonder if they really had any impact on me, or if the activity impacts children at all (and especially Bart!) So is it simply the writing, or is some measure of belief or intention required to really give power to this practice?

I have thought about this a lot since reading “The Power of Ritual - Turning Everyday Activities Into Soulful Practices” - by Casper ter Kuile, a book which I really enjoyed and highly recommend. The author wrote about rituals (some of them very recognisable to me - having grown up in church) and what can make them powerful - even to those of us who may not belong to particular organizations or churches. He wrote about sacred reading - which he and a friend practiced using the Harry Potter books (and which they eventually turned into a podcast) - as well as prayers, meditation and community. He talked about how many of these activities are present in many forms of structured religion, but that the rituals themselves carried their own level of impact - even outside of that context. For me it was interesting - it seemed that in addition to the repeated action, it is also important the intention that you have as you practice these rituals, and on the belief that you have as well.

So over the past few weeks as I have been journaling daily, writing down those future visions I have for myself, having gratitude for things that have happened (and those yet to happen) I have also been thinking about what would make these go from ink on a page, to actions taken out in the “real world”. One of the reasons I have never stuck with journaling, has been the fact that it just feels like words. I don’t necessarily feel connected to what I am writing - like I do when writing a letter, blog posts or books.

When I write blog posts (or some books) for example, I often feel connected not only to what I am writing, but to a force greater than myself (and I wrote about that here). When I write letters, I feel as if I am connecting to the reader - and so for argument sake when writing my newsletter, I connect to a friend of mine who I know receives it and loves reading it. But when I journal, it feels hollow. Like a to-do list. Write these things down twice a day, and become smart, rich and skinny! I don’t feel the potency behind it that I do even when I write other things.

Whenever I have conversations with those who journal regularly, the emphasis seems to be on the actual journaling, but I also happen to know that many of these people have their own belief systems and intentions that they set around the process, that I don’t have. It got me thinking about whether it is the journaling itself, or the level of belief that you have in what you are writing. Is the writing is just a vehicle to focus more on these ideas that you believe in - a vehicle for processing thoughts or feelings that you first must feel some level of connection with - both to the thoughts and feelings, and to the writing process? Are there other vehicles that could work for those who do not write by hand, or who for example are verbal processors who are less connected to the writing process? The therapist I used to work with used to have me write with my non-dominant hand sometimes to get me out of my looping thoughts and access something deeper, and it really did work. So I am willing to admit that the act of writing could definitely be a part of it. 

In addition, in my reading on the subject, I also came across the practice of expressive writing - which has also been shown to have positive effects on wellbeing. I remember trying this once a few years ago, but I found it difficult to dig very deep on the topic, sometimes not even coming up with words that felt as if they adequately described what I wanted to write about. I remember these questions about journaling came up again, about the fact that a person has to be willing to dig deep and be truly honest with themselves if they want to benefit from journaling, and be willing to tap into something that it might feel easier to leave dormant.

So it led me to think then (as now) that it wasn’t as simple as the writing, and just as important is the self- reflection that goes along with it. Maybe - despite outward appearances, I am not as introspective as I thought. Who knows. I imagine that time will tell.

To be honest, this is just me thinking out loud. As I mentioned before, I have been trying over the years to get comfortable with unanswered questions - and in this case, I have decided to continue the journaling experiment to see what comes out of it - even without the answers, or the connection I would like to feel to what I am writing. I continue to write down what I want to achieve for the rest of this year - and I continue to take the actions I think will bring these things about out here in the real world, and I continue to ponder the process.

I don’t think there is anything wrong or unusual with not feeling a connection with journaling (despite what people out there on the interwebs may say) and I will continue to consider what is at the heart of journaling, and how I can tap into this in other ways.

I’d love to hear about your experiences journaling, so please let me know in the comments. Are you someone who finds it to be a powerful and transformative practice? Or are you like me - on the fence, but willing to try it anyway to see what happens?

I send you big love from a small island.

PS: All content here is lovingly created by yours truly! Want to support my work? Then buy me a cup of tea!

PPS: Join my mailing list to know when my next blog post goes live!!

PPPS: I got my photos today from Jess Bailey , Stefan Grage , Emily Park and Aaron Burden on Unsplash Thanks to you all!!